White elephant exchanges should come naturally to me with my affinity for lowbrow humor, but the stress of securing the perfect representation of my wit and charm truthfully keeps me up at night! I’ve compiled a list of this year’s research in the hopes that it will prove itself useful should you find yourself in a pinch.
My husband and I have hosted his work Christmas party for the past few years. I’ll be giving From Crook to Cook (comfort recipes by Snoop Dogg) and also bringing the Keto Guido (by Vinny from Jersey Shore) in case anyone forgets theirs. Many of our guests bring gifts that are more on the NSFW side, but I don’t necessarily know everyone well enough to unleash my innermost gross and want to maintain whatever dignity I have left after the outfit mishap of 2017. I also envision this being a highly sought after gift as they have cute covers, they’re useful, and they’d provide an escape to whomever has the misfortune of stumbling upon my husband’s gift 🤦🏽♀️
Without further ado, here are a few additional options:
PG 13 & Punny
- Kevin & broccoli wall clock
- Justin Bieber singing toothbrush
- Electric egg cooker
- Porn for women book (don't worry, there's no nudity!)
- 101 Dad Jokes book
- Custom face pillow
- Golden girls shot glasses (or anything involving Betty White)
- Bee venom sheet mask
- The Screaming Goat book and figure
- What’s That Smell game
- Mushroom log kit
- Clip on selfie ring light
- Snuggies
- Mermaid tail blanket
- Mini waffle bowl maker
- Yellies
Potty Humor (never not funny)
- Subtle Butt Fart Pads
- Butt Face Soap
- How to Poop at Work book
- Toilet seat night light
- Sh*ttens Mittens
Gifts for total degenerates (don't worry, this is a safe space!)
- Nature's D*ck Pics book
- Boobie scarf
- Boobs or Butt game
- 50 Ways to Eat Cock cookbook
- Rudolph Mankini
- Candy Cane Stud Undies
- How to Live With a Huge Penis book
- Crusty Clam wipes
- Kitty Carpet
Enjoy and merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!
0 comments